don't leave me down here, all by myself

I close my eyes but all that I can see Is someone who I'm never gonna be

New York wasn't any different from any other place he had been to. It was the same thing over and over again, different surroundings, but same people. Same people over and over again, nothing was different for him, it never seemed to be anyways. Gabriel always was observant with people, more out of curiosity than anything than to this job. Though his career choice probably did play a part in his habit of people watching and watching their reaction to him. His inability to walk and take up space on the sidewalk that they were they were walking. The crowds were horrendous, but no one could help that. New York was a busy place and it was always crowded, but to show your displeasure of nothing sharing the walkway was something completely different. As Gabriel experienced this where he went. People stared, their faces turned, their attitudes changed, the way they saw him as a nuisance, as a blockade as they tried to maneuver out of the way of other people and couldn't because of him. And all he could do was sneer at them, try to make nice or just flat out yell at them for almost running him over in their own displeasure of getting around him. Though it always was fun to enjoy the moment of their displeasure as he could sit there and watch them, but at the same point he was the pawn in the entire game. He was the one who made all the moves, and just casually let people go by him or he didn't allow it at all. But considering he was disabled and confined to a wheelchair didn't mean people had to be rude about his disability when it wasn't his fault he was forced to be stuck in a chair for the rest of his life when someone took his walking ability. But that's another story.

He seemed pleased with himself, making his way to the restaurant in weather like this. It wasn't pleasant for him to try and navigate through snow, but he made it work. It might have taken a lot longer if people weren't giving him the worrying look of why he was out in the snow in the first place. He should have stayed inside or gotten a capable wheelchair that could travel through snow and all Gabriel could do was stare back at them. The way they stared him, he gave them the same look. But he made it to the place he was suppose to be at just fine, given it only taken a few more minutes that normal, given that the sidewalks were shoveled and people bothered to make an effort in moving out of the way as they were more capable in doing so than he was. Gabriel took his jacket off and maneuver his self in his chair to place it on the back of his wheelchair. He really didn't care to trust the communal coat rack for the sake of he didn't care to ask for help to get his jacket back in the first place. Today was more of a relax, focus on other things than work sort of day, but that seemed very unlikely though. Considering Gabriel had so much to do and so much was bottled up. Analyzing people and cases, grading work and figuring out how to go about in the up coming classes he was teaching at NYU and giving lectures to those in the FBI would wanted refreshers in New York and via Skype video. It seemed like it should have been an easy day, but he could have known it might have been a lot harder than it looked to him.

Though for now he was more focused on figuring out what he was going to eat as he sat at a table for one. Usually the usual occurrence he endured. Eating alone. Never really with another person unless, it was for work and there was a major case going on. But that wasn't at restaurants like this. A casual feeling, while still homey in the sense that he felt comfortable as the outside air was crisp and cold with snow still on the ground. Gabriel took his time to order though since he was in no rush to eat or go anywhere, he enjoyed staring out the window and just people watching. Another usual occurrence.

tag: open words: 733 notes: this post sucks and it's still long.

❝ give me love like never before  ❞

Fear. It seemed to be the seventeen year old's default setting, default emotion. He woke up scared, spent the whole day doing his best not to have a panic attack, and then went home to endure whatever it was his father had planned. A shudder shook his body but luckily he could blame it on the cold as he walked through the city, alone, blue eyes wide and staring down at the sidewalk beneath his feet, body hunched over to try and make himself seem smaller, as small as possible. He had his arms wrapped around his body, as if holding himself together, squeezing tightly enough that it hurt though that wasn't too difficult to do since his body was littered in bruises that were hidden by his clothes. But he didn't want to think about that. He had an excuse for the bruises. He was a horseback rider. He could just say he fell, could say his horse spooked at something, sent him flying off her back, and only those that knew how good of a rider he was would question it. Thankfully, no one knew who he was here since his family had recently moved here from North Carolina. Which brought another question. Why was a new resident of New York, just seventeen years old, wandering the city by himself? The answer was, on the surface, simple. Daddy said so. He was supposed to go to some restaurant, get a table for two, then text his father where he was so he could join him. Simple. Unless you knew that this was a punishment, that Hayden had severe social anxiety, and a small laugh was enough to make him cry, thinking the person was laughing at him. But he was doing it anyway because good boys never said no.

Eventually, he found a place and, body shaking, he opened the door. He hurried in, face flushed from the cold and nervousness, and, without stuttering too much, told the woman at the front that he needed a table for two. She led him to the table and he sat down, just sitting there, barely breathing, feeling his stomach church nervously despite having not eaten anything all day, and when the woman left, he rose to his feet. A mistake, really, because he was so unsteady he barely made it a few steps before his legs gave out and he fell forward, bumping into something. Someone? He didn't know. It felt like.. metal? But there was a person? There was a person!

His hand was on someones leg, his body sprawled out on the floor, his head resting against - he took a fearful glance - the wheel of a wheelchair. "I... I'm s-sorry, S-sir!" he managed to get out, still staring at the wheel just so he didn't have to look at the person, his eyes already watering, his chest tightening and a lump forming in his throat.

❝ cause lately i've been craving more ❞

gabriel thomas frost| word # | outfit
HAYDEN SHERWOOD

THISKIDSNOTALRIGHT of Adoxography